Amber

“The Song of the Lark”

Amber has joined my buddy Sage.

It’s sort of funny. It used to be that CF kids knew each other more than I did—we’d have wards and camps and so people had lots of CF friends. I never did, because that was all on the way out when I was diagnosed. I knew one kid from my first admission—Elvis (yes, that’s his name)—but I never saw him again after those two weeks of my first admit. (Although, in a strange twist of fate, one of my best college friends was from his hometown, and his mom was his teacher.)

There was Jenny, my freshman year of college—we were on the same dorm floor. I don’t know what happened to her.

But post transplant, I met more people with CF. Sage. Piper. People on Facebook. Kathleen. And Amber.

Unlike Sage, I had met Amber several times. She was the second transplant at our center (I was first, a fact that was a bee in her bonnet for awhile. Cracked me up.). She was younger than me, around my brother’s age (she was born in 1986). She’d been diagnosed with CF the normal way—as a little kid—but she lived nearer the Toledo center so that’s where she got her CF treatment.

We were both writers—she wrote a book called Breathtaking about her experience—and we both went to small Ohio colleges. (She had started at Cedarville University, but couldn’t finish because she got too sick, and eventually graduated from Moody Bible College.) She had a husband and they had adopted a little boy named Noah. He started preschool this month.

Amber had been in rejection for about two years, but she was a force. I mean, I’d never met anyone who was so unapologetic about herself, her life, her goals. She just told you whatever she thought, right out. “You can’t say that to people!” I”d tell her.

“Why not?”

Eventually, some of this rubbed off on me in dealing with our doctors. Ha.

She was just so unapologetically her. Honest, open, passionate, feisty. You always knew what she thought. But she wasn’t mean. She was just open in a way that a lot of people aren’t.

For two years she’d been driving from her home in northwest Ohio to get treatments at The Resort, to try to keep herself alive. There was talk of listing her for a second transplant.

I last saw her in July, at clinic. Clinic days are Mondays and so generally you tend to see other pre and post transplant patients at the same time in the halls and labs and in outpatient radiology. We got to catch up a bit, which was nice, because we hadn’t in awhile. She was carrying around a portable oxygen tank (when I say portable, it really was—it could be slung over your shoulder like a purse), but she was still fiery. Still giving me crap for wearing a skirt to the doctor’s. :-p “Comfort!” She said. And she was right, but I told her I preferred to use my feminine wiles to make the doctors do what I want. I was kidding, and she knew it, and we laughed about it.

I had seen on Instagram that she had missed an outing with her son to the zoo on Labor Day. But I thought she was okay. I have a news feed filter on my facebook app—basically, i don’t see scrolling updates anymore—so I had completely missed that she had been admitted with pneumonia and they had bronched her and she was in the ICU while they figured out a long-term plan.

I messaged her on Wednesday, to ask her a question about treatment. It was my brother’s birthday.

I got from his birthday dinner that night to find a message from her husband—Amber had died on Monday morning.

*

I don’t know why I’m alive, still, and Sage and Amber aren’t. Part of it is the idea that their journey, what God wanted them to do with their lives, was “complete”, I guess. And I’m not done. Which, I mean, is fine, I like being alive. But why me? Why not them too? Why are their husbands widowers, why is Noah without a mom, why did George the dog never see Sage come home? Why? Why do my siblings get to have me, and their siblings don’t?

I don’t know. I know God knows, I know He has his reasons, but I don’t know how much that really helps right now.

In Amber’s case, she had almost fourteen extra years. Her transplant anniversary was September 25. In those fourteen years, she wrote her book, she traveled to speak, she got married, she adopted Noah. She had extra time that she never would’ve had other wise.

But she was still only 33. Sage got an extra year of life, she had a wonderful husband and family and the sweet pups and even sweeter nieces and nephews.

I’m older than both of them.

A lot of people, post transplant, experience the feeling that they need to live for their donor. That they’re sort of entrusted with continuing the donor’s life as well as their own.

I never really felt that—probably because my donor was older, so it wasn’t like another 23 year old had died. (I’m not denigrating my donor’s gift, obviously! OBVIOUSLY. Just trying to explain how I feel.)

But I do feel, now, like I’m living for them. Sometimes I know Sage wants me to do something, to be brave and to ride it out.

And now I’ll feel Amber yelling at me to be honest and tell them how I really feel and figure stuff out, dang it. To just do x.

Both Amber and Sage had strong faith. I know that they’re happy. (I mean, one has to be happy when beholding the beatific vision, right?)

But gosh, I miss them both.

Seven Quick Takes--dance and a little simplicity

Linking up with Kelly!

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If you missed it, I did a Yarn Along earlier this week!

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Another thing I’ve been doing is going to dance class. Yes, I have started back, at a great studio, with a fabulous teacher. At the end of class on Wednesday night (in which I did a single pirouette, go me), I felt great. I called my sister afterwards and said, “That was such a great class! I have so much energy! I was pumped!”

“That’s what exercise is supposed to feel like,” Melanie said.

Well, shut me up. I guess I’ve been missing that for 37 years….

So I’ll be going to dance class on Wednesday nights from now on. Woo woo!

-3-

I did have dance as a kid. But the only athletic goal I ever had was to get into pointe shoes, and I figured, since that’s the only athletic thing I’ve ever wanted, maybe I should….try to do that? So I’m trying.

I have a foam roller, a massage ball, and a theraband for working on foot and ankle strength. I am committed,!

And warm up booties! :)

Check out first position in the Bloch booties, y’all. :)

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OK, before I talk about Simplicity, if you haven’t signed up for the email list, please do it? Because then you get all the fun book things first! (well, after my parents.) Go here! No spam! Promise!

(Already a subscriber? I love you! Mwah!)

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OK, so simplicity stuff.

September always makes me think about routine and rhythm and changes I want to make (hence, dance classes). And I thought, you know, I might as well write about these things. Because I think we can all use ideas on how to focus on what really matters, right? To give ourselves margin and to stop the crazy comparison game?

Now, I’m not married and I don’t have kids. I’m just gonna point that out. That makes some things easier for me—as in, I’m only responsible for myself and my own laundry. :) But at the same time, it also makes things harder, because everything is on me. I don’t have a husband to help me out.

That being said, I think that I can still share some things that I’ve found to be worthwhile. So I will share them with you!

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I’m so ready for pro football to start. I’m so glad college football has come back. Sports doldrums are over!

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I’ve been looking for some new movies to watch lately. What have you loved that I need to see? Share in the comments!

Yarn Along #90: Fun with Knit and Purl! :)

So, getting away from the heavy stuff in the last post, let’s talk about yarn!

linking up with Ginny

So, Quince and Co. celebrated their birthday a few months ago, and they were having a sale on their first collection of patterns—sale meaning, if you were an email subscriber, you got a code for one free pattern from this collection! So I chose the Isla scarf, because, one, it’s a scarf, and I like those (obviously), but it’s also a fun pattern that does some nifty things, using knit and purl stitches. I’m knitting it in their Lark yarn, lupine colorway, and let me tell you, this is pretty great yarn. (The color description for Lupine is, “Deep periwinkle waving in Maine summer breezes.” Who can resist that?)

It’s slow going because I do have to pay attention to what I’m doing—not only are there pattern changes, but also needle size changes, which at first I was worried about, but it’s not hard. And one “repeat” of the pattern is 28 rows. So this isn’t really a great watching TV project, because I have to concentrate, but it’s still a lot of fun to work on. This might be a good sports knit, because I can watch the game but it’s not like there’s plot. :)

See those little rows? Those are from using the smaller needles. This is so squishy, you can’t even believe it.

Here’s a better look at the length….

I am, as usual, reading five million books, but the one you see here is for a Facebook Book Club. We’re reading Loss and Gain * to prep for John Henry Newman’s October canonization. I’m on track with the reading but not my contributing, bad me!

I’m also reading Gift from the Sea * (again) and Emily Ley’s books, Grace Not Perfection * and A Simplified Life. * September is the “new school, new year” season for me—does it feel like that to you? I always feel like I want to lay down new rails and set new habits and structures in place. (And keep your eyes peeled—I’ll have a post—or several—about this soon!)

*=Amazon affiliate link

Miracles (and suffering)

(This might not make a lot of sense, but it’s something I’ve been thinking about this week, so I thought I’d share with you.)

How do you define a miracle?

Normally we use it in the sense of something extraordinary, out of the ordinary, that can’t be explained. Generally it’s a life-saving thing—a miraculous healing, a miraculous escape, a miraculous rescue.

And the other thing we tend to associate with miracles is perfection. The person is perfectly healed. The person is perfectly restored to life and health and family.

But is that true?

Jesus did a lot of miracles in the Bible. He still does them today. I know I’ve been the recipient of several.

But you know, Lazarus still had to die. So did the little girl.

I will die, eventually. So will you. So will your family.

(#LivingMementoMori, y’all! :) )

Sunset—no filter required—outside Orchard House.

Miracles are great. Believe me, I believe in them, as the song says. I believe in them strongly. I pray for them.

But I’ve never had a miracle that fits the definitions above—the “perfect” part. I’ve received miracles, but there are other aspects of them too.

I’ve lost hearing. I almost lost my arm. And those things, in the grand scheme of things, are small, because I’m alive. But when I was sick, I didn’t ask God for perfection. I asked Him for life. I asked for the chance to keep on living.

(In order to get my CF diagnosis, we had to switch pediatricians, which happened because my old pediatrician died. The connection of all of us in the grand story is impossible to unravel. )

Some people don’t get that miracle. Why did I get it, and Sage didn’t? Why are some people healed, and not others?

But there are other kinds of miracles—miracles of grace. The miracle of acceptance, of fortitude, of grace and cheerfulness and continued life even in the face of darkness and doubt and despair.

A miracle doesn’t necessarily mean perfection. It doesn’t mean that we get exactly what we want when we want it, because God knows so much better than we do, which is crazy to think about. What good was achieved by Sage’s death? What good is achieved by so many of the losses, of the pain, of the darkness? What good is achieved when babies die and people commit suicide and people starve?

I don’t know. And neither do you.

God does, though.

God sent His own son to die for us. Every single one of us will face death, and we will face pain and loss of those we love and things we can’t live without.

We beg for miracles. That’s true. That’s right. God wants us to ask for them.

But…..sometimes the miracle isn’t the physical miracle.

You know, Mother Angelica once said she could go to heaven with a broken body, but she couldn’t get there with a broken soul. That’s true.

Pray for the miracles. Pray for God’s intervention. Ask, seek, knock, beg.

But remember that if God doesn’t give you what you want, it doesn’t mean that He didn’t hear you. It doesn’t mean that He’s smiting you. It doesn’t mean that you didn’t have enough faith. (That one gets me, big time. Mary’s baby boy died—and no one had more faith than she did!)

Be thankful for imperfect healing. Be thankful for imperfect life. Be thankful for acceptance.

And the thanks might come on the far side of a lot of yelling at God, or screaming, or almost despair. God I do not understand.

You’re not alone in that. The apostles didn’t understand either. We can’t understand.

What we need to cling to, though, is that in every situation, in all circumstances, God is with us.

This isn’t airy fairy talk. This is talk I know. I know even in the darkest moments, in that valley of death—the real one, actual, true death—God is there, even if I don’t feel Him, and there are times when I haven’t. It’s not like I’m always walking around in a cloud of Blessed Assurance, y’all.

Miracles are gifts to us. But we aren’t owed them. I didn’t do anything to “deserve” getting a second chance at life.

The psalmist says that God’s ways are mysterious. There’s no better place to see that than at the precipice between life and death.

The miracle you might need the most might not be the one you’re asking for.

Seven Quick Takes--St. Rose and Staycation

Linking up with Kelly!

I.

Today is the Feast Day of St. Rose of Lima, a Dominican Tertiary! She is an excellent saint for our times.

II.

You may have noticed some blog silence round these parts—I tend to blog less in the summer. But we’ll be revving back up again, especially as book news comes out. If you want to know all the book goodness first, then sign up for my mailing list! (No spam. Only fun things. Pinky promise.)

III.

“OK, Emily, enough, tell me about staycation!”

OK.

So, we went to Colorado for my sister’s wedding in June, but, as you know if you’ve had a family wedding lately, they’re fun, but they’re work too—you have to make sure your clothing gets to the place unmolested, that your shoes fit, that the priest shows up, etc. etc. etc. And that you didn’t forget anything two thousand miles away. And I’d just finished the first draft of the manuscript. So yeah, I was beat when June was over!

I finally decided that I wanted to take a ‘staycation’ in August. I’d never done it, but it sounded like fun.

I made this a really cheap staycation. I did not have a masseuse come to my house, I didn’t hire a cleaning service to clean my house, and I didn’t get a room in a hotel (all of these are actual staycation suggestions I found on the internet. OK, folks. The hotel one was the only one I didn’t think was really out there. If you want someone to clean your house, fine, and that’s legit, but….as a staycation? I guess….anyway, I digress!)

I set a limited budget, and made a plan. That budget would encompass everything I wanted to do, just like a real vacation, except I was staying in town. Columbus has a lot of fun things! When my family goes on vacation to the beach, we normally eat out for one meal, and have the others at our beach house; I have a nice tea/coffee break in the afternoon; and I do a lot of reading. So all those things were incorporated as well.

IV.

Monday was sort of the planning day. Tuesday was when I ventured forth!

The first place I went was Franklin Park Conservatory and Botanical Gardens. They had several exhibits I wanted to see—a Chihuly installation (above and beyond what the conservatory already has, which is a lot), Blooms and Butterflies (where they release hundreds of butterflies into the Pacific Island Room), and a bonsai exhibit. It would also be a great time to sketch! So I packed up my sketching stuff and headed off to the conservatory.

(To see the gallery photos, swipe or use your arrow keys!)

I’ll have to take photos of my sketchbook pages so I can show you what I did.

It’s always a lot of fun going here. There are different “biomes”—Himalayan Mountains, Rainforest, Desert, and the Pacific Island Water Garden. The Bonsai exhibit was held in a different gallery, where it was very hot, because, glasshouse and it was 90 degrees. But it was still fun. I ate lunch here and grabbed a butterfly shaped silicone tea infuser to replace my tea balls that keep BREAKING!

After I had lunch and finished sketching, I went home, made some tea, read a bit, and then went swimming after dinner.

V.

Wednesday I took a trip to German Village. German Village is, as the name suggests, an area of town that was founded by German Immigrants in the 19th century. Many of the streets are still paved with bricks, and the houses showcase the original architecture. It’s also home to some of the city’s best eating!

I went to Schmidt’s, which was founded in 1886 and serves some pretty epic sausage. The thing about Schmidt’s is they don’t take reservations. So you either get here right when it opens at 11, you eat at off-times, or you just wait. OR, you come alone, like I did, and you eat at the bar, where there is usually no wait! Yay!

After Schmidt’s, I headed to a local coffee shop and then to The Book Loft, which is an incredible independent bookstore built into an old house (or several!). It’s amazing. You could spend hours here, and you get all your steps in wandering around! :) Before cell phones it was interesting to go here with a group—you just sort of had to hope you’d find each other again. I think every book is 5% off, and some are really marked down, like more than half, or even 75%, so you can always find good deals here, and books that other places won’t have. It’s a little bit addictive. I sketched the fountain in their courtyard, and came home with some awesome Wizard of Oz magnets.

(If, somehow, you have missed my addiction to The Wizard of Oz— I have one.)

VI.

Yesterday I had tea with my friend Mary before she goes off to graduate school, and that was delicious, as always. (Cambridge Tea House is the best!)

I also watched To Kill A Mockingbird and started watching Wizard, because it’s turning 80 on Sunday!

VI.

So that was my ‘staycation’. Today is the last day, and I’m having lunch with my dad this afternoon, which we do just about every week and I enjoy. (Last week it was lunch and shopping with mom, which was equally enjoyable!) This afternoon I’ll probably sketch a bit and knit and…do laundry. Which is part of a week-long vacation, anyway. :)

So that’s how I staycationed! Have you ever done this? Any questions about how I did it? Really, once I made a list of all the things I could do in town, it was hard to choose! (I might do one more thing tomorrow before Mass. We’ll see!

Living the Church Year: Assumption Party!

So we’re gonna start with the real-ness, here:

Realness, people. It’s even blurry because I was tired, sorry bout that. :)

But also the sign of a good party, if there are lots of dishes and plates and cutlery and cups in the sink…..it means people ate and drank and made merry!

So, when I wrote about Feasting last week, I didn’t mean multiple courses and all sorts of fancy dinner accoutrements and fancy things like that.

No. What I meant was a dinner in your home with other people!

It doesn’t have to be complicated! You don’t have to have everything perfect!

Let me tell you what I did.

First: Invite the people

My table only seats four adults (unless I put the leaf in, which is at my parents’ house). So inviting three people was the max I could do for a sit down dinner. I checked with my friends, we picked a day that worked, which was also the day before the Assumption, so, Assumption Party!

Otherwise it would’ve been a late St. Dominic’s Day Party. :) OR a something something feast day party. :) We’re good at naming things around here.

Second: Figure out the menu

I didn’t want to make anything terribly elaborate. I always make Guinness Cake for dessert….

The cake, in mom’s cake stand, which she lent me! Thanks, mom!

For dinner, I made Rachael Ray’s Drunken Tuscan Pasta, which is really yummy, and easy to serve to people. I don’t always like making pasta for a dinner party because you can’t really make it ahead. But then as I was making this, I remembered why I like it—it’s just so dang good. (I”ll give you the recipe.)

Third: Delegate

I didn’t do all of this myself. One of the guests brought sparkling water and a bottle of wine, and another brought the makings of an appetizer and a big, lovely salad, which she made at my place. It was so fun having someone to cook with in my kitchen! It’s so much more convenient here than it was at the old place, because I have an island instead of a “peninsula” sort of thing, so people can cook in multiple places!

Fourth: Make a plan

I wrote out my list of ingredients and went grocery shopping a week before (and then two days before, for the things I had to get sort of fresh, like the portobello tops) . The cake can be—indeed should be—made the day before, so I did that. That way all I had to do was cook the pasta when people were here. A few hours before everyone’s arrival I chopped rosemary, sliced mushrooms, and portioned out red pepper flakes into my little prep bowls. This just makes everything easier when people get there.

Fifth: Try to make it pretty

“try” being the key word here….

I used my pasta serving bowls, which I got at Crate and Barrel eons ago, but are perfect for this. I even dug out place mats and real napkins, because, hey, why not?

And finally….

It doesn’t have to be perfect!

I didn’t have wine glasses. People drank wine out of mugs! It was FINE! We used the same forks for salad and pasta! It was fine! (We did have different forks for the cake, though, because I had enough for that!)

The house was spic and span because it was the first party in the new hours, and we had house blessing (one of the guests was a priest) and the guests hadn’t seen Orchard House before so I wanted it to look nice. But really, I still didn’t go nuts. I didn’t polish all the fixtures until they sparkled. I didn’t freak out about water spots on the windows from a rain storm.

The point of a party is to get together and have fun and celebrate!

So, yes, make sure your house isn’t, you know, unsafe! :) Make sure it’s hygenic! :)

Make sure it’s comfortable, that people have places to sit, but really, don’t worry about everything looking like House Beautiful because it’s not going to happen!

And even if I didn’t make dinner and we just had Chipotle take out, it would’ve been fun. If the food doesn’t turn out, or you burn it, get a pizza and just chill. It’ll be fine.

I’ve found that having people over to share food and conversation (and prayer!) is a great way to build community, to bolster your feelings, to feel that you’re not alone, and that living the Christian life is a pretty great thing to do. We need community!

So go out there and plan a party!

St. Dominic, the Innkeeper, and Twenty-First Century Preaching

El Greco, St. Dominic in Prayer

There’s a story about St. Dominic that’s familiar to every Dominican, and I think it has important implications for us today.

Here’s how the Nashville Dominicans tell the story on their website:

Two years later a diplomatic trip brought Dominic into the Albi region of Southern France. A strong zeal for the salvation of souls was enkindled when the young canon encountered an innkeeper who was steeped in the errors of the Catharists, a heresy which threatened the region. Although other religious had been commissioned to preach in the region, little progress had been made. After a long night of intense discussion, the light of truth prevailed and the innkeeper returned to the practice of the faith.

So let’s break this down. Think of a hotel. Imagine you’re in the lobby, getting something to drink before you go to bed, and you start making small talk with the desk clerk. You discover that he’s an agnostic.

You have a few options:

Don’t say anything. Just smile and say good night, but mentally pray for him.

Share that you’re Catholic. Don’t go any father.

Tell him that he’s going to Hell.

Say that you’re Catholic and spend the rest of the night trying to browbeat him into submission!

What did St. Dominic do? He talked to the innkeeper. All night. You can imagine that it wasn’t full of highly charged statements (like, hey, you’re going to Hell! Good night!) or polemics. It was probably logical—because we Dominicans love study—and it was probably methodical. And it was also probably gentle. I doubt the innkeeper would’ve stayed up all night if St. Dominic was banging him over the head with proofs!

There’s nothing wrong with a good discussion, including one that gets a little exciting.

My siblings and I are all half-Italian. When we have discussions, we get loud. We get boisterous. We use our hands! For people new to way we converse, you can think we’re arguing. (Growing up, our mother, who is not Italian, often told us to stop arguing. “We’re not arguing! We’re talking!”) St. Dominic was Spanish, so I wonder if he used his hands, too. Maybe!

But there’s a distinction between passionate arguing and getting personal. And on St. Dominic’s Feast Day, that’s what I want to talk about.

St. Dominic (detail) from “Christ Mocked with the Virgin and St. Dominic,” Fra Angelico

One of the mottos of the Dominican order is “Veritas”—truth. We love truth. We live to spread the truth of the Gospel all over the world! And that’s part of the reason we study, so that we can know what the truth is. Truth isn’t about what you think is true, or a “personal truth". (for example, children believe that Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and the Easter Bunny exist. We could call that their “personal truths.” )

Truth is verifiable. Truth can be known. Sometimes, yes, there is mystery! We will never understand everything—and we’re not meant to. Some things are just beyond our reach on this earth. But we know the truth of faith because it’s able to be studied. It’s able to be seen. We believe in the truth of Jesus Christ. At Mass every week, we say the “credo”—”I believe”. This isn’t what just I believe, or what you believe, or what the pope beliefs, or what Fr. Patrick up on the altar believes. It’s what we have always believed, as a people, a family of faith.

If you are Catholic, you have to know what you believe, and why you believe it—and you have to assent to it. You can’t just say, well, that’s fine for you, but I don’t believe in Transubstantiation. (You would be….wrong!) I don’t believe in the Church’s definition of marriage. I don’t believe in Hell. Etc.

Truth is truth whether you believe in it or not. People believed the earth was flat—but it wasn’t. People believed that slaves weren’t people—but they were. People believe that unborn babies aren’t people—but they are. See how this goes?

It goes without saying that the truth needs to be spread far and wide. That’s part of what Dominicans do.

But, the question is “how to do it.” As the Wicked Witch of the West said, “These things must be handled delicately.” We can’t be too nice that we deny people the truth—because the truth sets them free, and truth is the best thing you can give someone! But we also can’t be so awful and hard-core that we turn people away from hearing the truth and listening to it.

Let’s take a story from the Bible. It’s one that’s familiar to everyone—the story of the woman caught in adultery. I’m going to quote it here, so we can all have it freshly before us:

John 8:3-11

The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman who had been caught in adultery, and placing her in their midst they said to him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. Now in the law Moses commanded us to stone such. What do you say?” This they said to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to cast a stone at her.” And once more he bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. But when they heard it, they went away, one by one, beginning with the eldest, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. Jesus looked up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and do not sin again.”

Do not sin again. That’s the crux, really. We are all sinners. Every single one of us. I am, you are, everyone. None of us is without sin. But Jesus doesn’t say to the woman, “Oh, what you did is fine. Go ahead, go home, it’s all good.” He said, I don’t condemn you. But don’t sin again. That’s what happens when we go to confession—we have to promise to try not to sin again. We can’t just think, oh, I can do what I want, because confession!

Jesus loves us more than we can possibly imagine. And because he does, he doesn’t want us to keep messing up. It makes him sad! Do parents like it when their kids make bad choices? No! But are they angry? Maybe. Are they disappointed and sad? I think this is probably more likely. (I mean, they might be angry at first. But I think then it becomes more sad/disappointed.)

When we discuss heated issues in the twenty-first century, we are not good about being gentle about it, like Jesus is here. Now, yes, Jesus also turned over tables in the temple. Sometimes we can be righteously angry. I get righteously angry whenever I talk about disabilities or abortion. That’s my thing. But if I slip and start calling people names, or want to incite violence against them, I am sinning.

We can be preachers of the word. We have to be, both preachers of the word and doers of it. We have to live the life of Christ. Sometimes that means standing up for people. Sometimes that means living a quiet life of witness. Sometimes it means both!

If you want to make your point, if you want to convert people, you aren’t going to do it, usually, by violence or hatred or name calling. We need to stop doing that. We need to do it like St. Dominic did it—gently, with facts, with truth, and then….step back. See how it goes. Conversions aren’t instantaneously. St. Dominic famously cried, “Oh Lord, what will become of sinners?” He cared about them. He didn’t just want to score a point like in a college debate match. He didn’t want to just win. He wanted the other person to see the truth because it would save them.

Politics in America has always been nasty (see the Election of 1800!). But we must stop seeing each other as enemies across a divide. We have to state our position, but also realize that we can be friends with people who don’t vote the way we do. In fact, we are required to love them.

I know things get heated in the public realm. I worked in politics for 10 years. I saw it, up close and personal. We cannot want to kill our opponents, guys. We can’t approve the shooting of congressmen and women because the victim disagreed with us! What kind of people will we be then?

A story was told to me by the first legislative aide I worked with, who had been in the senate a long time. She said that senators used to argue like crazy on the floor, and then go out to dinner together. They were friends with each other. That was becoming rarer and rarer

Christianity isn’t a religion for wimps. Jesus doesn’t ask us to be a doormat. He asks us—and St. Dominic shows us how—to preach the truth, to live the truth with our lives, to pray for our enemies. We can have discussions—even loud Italian ones! We can be passionate! I’ve always been passionate when talking about the Church.

But there’s a fine line between being passionate, and being so whipped up into a frenzy that you can’t see the human being on the other side.

St. Dominic saw the humanity in the people he met. That’s what drove him to preach—his concern for them and his love for Christ.

Does the same thing compel us?

August yarn along--a bit of lace

linking up with Ginny!

So, on Sunday I decided to try working on a basic lace pattern. I have to do lacework for my Find Your Fade shawl, and when I first tried it in January, I was really confounded by it! So I’ve been working on smaller projects to try to get the hang of it.

This is a horseshoe lace pattern bookmark…..

You can see why it’s called horseshoe!

This really isn’t hard. I know it looks hard! But the twisting happens just naturally as the way the pattern is written. The problem for me right now is that this isn’t knitting you can sort of pay attention to—you have to pay attention the whole time. The pattern repeats in sets of 8, but if you miss a row, interesting things happen. (Ask me how I know this….)

The pattern called for size 3 needles, which I don’t have, so I used size 4, and the yarn is from my feile shawl. It was just too pretty to sit in my stash!

These are long bookmarks. They don’t look this long in the pattern photo, but trust me, they are….

As for what I’m reading….

I’ve read The Lambs * before, and it’s just great. If you love stories about animals, the natural world, family relationships and….sheep, you’ll really like it!

I’ve also got this big stack—one library book, three pleasure reading novels, and a whole bunch of books for the Well-Read Mom year….

There are two more books for the year that I haven’t gotten yet, and two more that I already have and are on my shelves—The Picture of Dorian Gray and Little Women. (Of course I have Little Women! My house is named after their house!)

I’ve also created a list that sums up all the knitting projects in the pipeline right now—a baby blanket, a scarf (new pattern! Exciting! I don’t actually have a long scarf for me to use in the winter!), my Find Your Fade shawl—I’ll at least do the set up section again and get that on the needles—and a cowl I’ve been wanting to make forever!

Feast, Feast, Feast!

Guys, it’s AUGUST!

And that means that it’s time to FEAST!

The Church calendar is just jam packed with feasts in August! This week we had…

Dedication of St. Mary Major (yesterday)

The Transfiguration (today)

Thursday is the feast of St. Dominic! (A feast for me, because, DOMINICAN POWER!)

And then we have the feast day of St. Edith Stein, and Maximilian Kolbe, and the Assumption is next week…..

It’s all happening!

Part of living the Catholic life is living liturgically, which means to fast when the Church fasts….and to FEAST when the Church feasts!

Remember to do that! It’s not just about the penance and the fasting! It’s about joy, too!

So be sure to celebrate!

Raphael, The Transfiguration

I’m having an Assumption Party next week, so I’ll share all those details with you, to give you an idea of a feast you can have at home with pals.

But really, be sure you celebrate the days that are important to you. Celebrate your confirmation saint’s day! Celebrate the Holy Days and the Feasts! Join the Church in her party!

Seven Quick Takes--Easing Into August

Linking up with Kelly!

-i-

Hiya, August! Whew!

This summer has been sort of intense, at least June, and then July was sort of decompression, and now it’s August! In some places around here, the kids go back to school in two weeks!

So here’s what going on around Orchard House….

-II-

My city has a farmer’s market every week in the summer and then once a month the rest of the year (it’s indoor then, too). And now I live essentially three minutes away from it, so yesterday I decided to check it out. There’s a vendor that sells meat from his farm! That made me really happy, so I bought a brisket (which I’ve never cooked, but hey, why not), and a pound of ground beef. I also bought tomatoes and candy onions, and I should’ve gotten a LOT more tomatoes so I could make sauce, but…..next week!

Fortunately the market runs weekly through September, so I have two months to stock up on stuff. Looking forward to that.

-III-

I also made a few new recipes this week. I don’t really like to cook in the summer, but somehow in August my brain switches over and says, OK, we can cook now. No idea why. So I’ve made a few good things this week, all Barefoot Contessa recipes: chicken thighs in creamy mustard sauce (I subbed light sour cream for the creme fraiche), Israeli Couscous and Tuna Salad, and Raspberry Crumble Bars.

The topping is granola and some of the shortbread base.

-IV-

In book news: I have a copy edited manuscript, and now I have to go over it to see if I want to make any changes (or to catch any glaring errors). So that’s due next week. It’s so weird to re-read what I’ve written…..I hope I don’t think it’s all awful and want to chuck it out. :-p

-V-

We’re in a really busy section of the church year—there are so many feasts and saints’ days in August! And St. Dominic is next week!

-VI-

Here’s a look at the state of the To Read Stack:

WHEW!

-VII-

Also, if you’re looking for some daily spiritual reading, check out A Year With the Mystics. It’s not out until next month, but through an Amazon glitch, I got my pre-ordered copy early!

It’s so beautiful, and it’s making for wonderful spiritual reading!

A Chatty Seven Quick Takes

Linking up with Kelly!

-1-

This is for my musical theater nerds!

I was thinking this week what the best Rodgers and Hammerstein musical is. (show, not film. In that category it’s definitely The Sound of Music, because it’s a fabulous film and I think it makes the original material better.) My vote is for Carousel, by a smidge (because I do like South Pacific); my dad supports South Pacific, and there was a vote for The King and I.

I think Carousel is the best for a few reasons: a fabulous leading man part; four good female roles (Julie, Carrie, Nettie, and Mrs. Mullins); a glorious score; and good use of chorus. The chorus actually has opportunities to do things often, as opposed to The King and I.

Is it perfect? No. I don’t think we need “Stonecutters” (and I think that was axed from the last Broadway revival), the whole “yes, someone can hit you and it doesn’t hurt at all” thing (eeeeek!), and the ballet can be too long. But, I think that we wouldn’t have had West Side Story, or Fiddler, or really any sort of true musical drama, without Carousel.

-II-

I started working with my Colonial Williamsburg yarn this week. Some of you may remember my extra special Yarn Along about that, and it’s taken me two years to figure out what to do with the yarn! So I’m going to do something simple, but, hopefully, historically accurate. I’m making a scarf, with slipped stitch edges, on size 8 needles. I didn’t want to do it on big needles because they didn’t have big (like, size 12) needles in Colonial times, I don’t think. But this yarn is thick, so I couldn’t do it on a small needle, like a size 5 or below. So I thought a scarf would be a practical, Colonial thing, and I have a lot of yarn, so it’ll be nice and long and warm.

The source of my yarn! Leicester Longwool sheep!

-III-

Reading: I read Where the Crawdads Sing, * and I LOVED IT. I really want to discuss it with someone! Highly recommend it.

I’m currently reading about five million things, but I’m also really liking Greek to Me, * because it appeals to two sides of my personality: A love of ancient Greek myth and culture, and word nerdiness. And book nerdiness!

-IV-

A note on the Mueller hearings, but a NON POLITICAL ONE!

One of the things that bothered me about the coverage was that people kept saying that Mueller needed questions repeated, like this was somehow a slam on his intelligence or “with it”-ness.

Guys. No.

I am crazy sensitive about this, because, hello, hearing impaired. I hate asking people to repeat themselves because I know they’re thinking I’m a dim bulb, or not paying attention, or flaky, or something. But really, I want to make sure I understood you!

I don’t know if Robert Mueller is hearing impaired. But I do know that we really, really should stop thinking that if someone asked for something to be repeated, that they’re stupid or cognitively challenged or whatever.

-V-

Nothing new on the book front yet. But please sign up for the mailing list! Then you get all the delicious news first and there might be fun things for subscribers! (Well, there are fun things—two printables I designed—but maybe more than that, who knows!) Sign up!

-VI-

July is like sports doldrums. Sigh. Once Wimbledon is over I just languish until sports pick up again in August. I don’t really like the NBA, and I’m a Pirates fan, so that’s sort of like constant baseball futility, but oh well. August and football will be here soon!

-VII-

I also joined a book club! Well, I’ve done it before. It’s called Well Read Mom, but this time, I looked into joining a group in my area, and there is one! Yay! I really miss discussing books with folks. I’m obviously not a mom, but any lady can join these! I love this book club because it’s not just current lit. There’s spiritual reading, plays, essays, novels….all sorts of things! It delights my little heart. (And this year Little Women is one of the books, which is so appropriate for my Orchard House dwelling soul!) Have you ever joined a book club or wanted to?

*==I’m an Amazon affiliate, so if you buy a book through these links, I get a tinnnny bit of money, which helps keep the lights on over here! :)

Seven Quick Takes--writing, pro-life ministry, and Washer Monster

Linking up with Kelli!

-1-

Around these parts this week:

Doing the best you can with what you have

Prime Day deals—Prime Day is over, but if you haven’t checked in with Take Up & Read lately, we have a lot of gorgeous studies! Maybe it’s time to start Christmas shopping?

-2-

This is sort of a…well, a sad take. But.

On Twitter this week I saw a woman writing about how she didn’t know how to get a casket for her miscarried child.

The Trappist monks of New Melleray Abbey provide infant and child caskets free to families.

Free. Gratis. No charge.

Go here, and scroll down to “child”, and select a size.

These are beautiful handmade caskets. In addition to the caskets, the monks will plant a memorial tree for your child, and remember your child in a special Mass. The parents also receive a keepsake cross made of th same wood as the casket.

If you need one IMMEDIATELY, call them at:

888-433-6934

They answer the phone 24 hours a day.

They also have a child casket fund, where people can donate to support this ministry, here.

This is such a beautiful service they provide. I know it’s terribly hard to think about, but I have had friends who have lost children to miscarriage. This makes one part of it easier—you don’t have to make your child’s casket or fumble around at a funeral home. The monks will do it, beautifully, for free.

-3-

The book skips along! It’s done with copy edits so my editor has it now and is working on it. No cover art yet but the minute I have it I’ll share with you (subscribers find out first!)

-4-

This week I finished a long linen scarf I knit to use in the summer. I love it. It’s a gorgeous color. So I went to block it in my washing machine. I had run a test piece of linen before and it came out fine so I thought I’d be fine this time.

NOPE.

Washer Monster wanted to eat it.

via GIPHY

But my lovely maintenance man here saved it! Yay!

Yay! It’s saved!

I’m always amazed at how well linen blocks. It’s just great. Such a difference!

-5-

I’m on an Emily Blunt movie binge lately. I watched The Devil Wears Prada and A Quiet Place this week and I’m going to watch Mary Poppins Returns tonight. (My movie BF Colin F. is in it too. I do love his movies.)

-6-

Sometimes we live in Hoth, here in Ohio, and sometimes it’s in the 90s with a heat index giving us a temp of 114. Yeah, it’s that day. So, movie binging and working on house projects today!

-7-

It feels hard to believe that July is half over and that Target has school supply displays up. When do the schools in your area go back? Ours tend to go back in the middle of August now, but they get out before June.

Doing The Best You Can With What You Have

Under the Wave off Kanagawa (Kanagawa oki nami ura), also known as the Great Wave, from the series “Thirty-six Views of Mount Fuji (Fugaku sanjurokkei)”

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day, who, like me, has had some health problems. And we were talking about how the things you do to save your life can later come back and have unplanned consequences.

“I’m dealing with that right now,” I said. We talked a bit more about how frustrating this is—but then we asked, Would we have changed anything?

And the answer is, probably not.

So I thought I’d write about this.

*

After my clinic visits, we always have to wait for blood test results. One of them that we’ve been watching lately is called the A1c, which I talked about in the last post. Basically, it’s a batting average for your blood sugar. And ever since I entered menopause it’s been going up….and up….and up.

This is not good. The more sugar is in your blood, the more that can lead to lots of problems. Problems that I don’t want.

This isn’t CF related diabetes, because my pancreas still works. (I don’t take enzymes to digest my food, so that’s how we know….) But at the same time, my body is clearly becoming insulin resistant.

I’ve been on steroids for 14 years. So the thought is that steroids + menopause=unhappy A1c.

Now, I can’t go off steroids. I’m on a low dose—5 mg a day. There is a 2.5 mg dose. And I might try that. But the problem is, my body has adjusted to them, and my joints, especially like prednisone. A lot. I had CF related arthritis before my transplant and that is helped a lot by the prednisone. I notice when I miss a dose. So when I tried to go off prednisone a few years ago, my body said, “nope.”

Why am I on prednisone? Because I had a transplant.

Which saved my life.

But we know that prednisone has a lot of side effects.

*

Another area where side effects come to play? Cancers. We’ve talked about that a lot here.

And, not pred related, but med related—my hearing loss.

So, these are all things that have happened as a result of staying alive.

But—what were my choices?

Well, to take the meds, or die. Really. It was that stark, in a lot of cases.

So I decided to take the meds. And live with the side effects.

And that can be sort of sucky, to be honest. Because you do things to save your life, but then…there are consequences, and you have to be ready to deal with those. It’s a long-term gamble.

But, and I said this to my friend, we do the best we can with the information we have. We can’t think about 5, 10, 15 years down the road when we’re looking down the barrel of the gun right now.

If you’re in that situation, I know how you feel. I know it’s hard not to google and think about the future. But really, in my opinion, the best thing to do is to talk to your doctors, see what the options are, and then go with what is best—for you, for the situation, for what needs to happen to achieve a good outcome.

Does that mean you’ll be thrilled with what you have to do? Well, no. I’m not thrilled that I’m injecting myself with five units of insulin every night. But it could be worse.

This is what I have to do to stay alive—to see year 15, year 16, year 17….post-transplant.

Now, are there things I won’t do? Yeah. I’ve always said I wouldn’t go for a third transplant. That, to me, is a bridge too far.

But right now, I take the insulin, I adjust my diet, and I do the best I can with what I have.

Prime Day Savings on Take Up And Read Studies!!

Hi everyone!

As you know, I write for the Take Up & Read bible studies, headed by the amazing Elizabeth Foss. And since it’s Prime Day (today, July 15 AND tomorrow July 16!), you can save $5 on our studies!

Use the code PRIMEBOOK19 to save $5 on any book over $15!

This would be great for Christmas shopping or getting yourself the studies that you missed!

I really am so proud to be a part of this ministry and to see the beautiful work that we do in the hopes of getting more people to read Scripture. If you haven’t tried a book, pick one and try it now? Sales are so rare, so take advantage of this one!

Here we are all our titles:

Our first study, Consider the Lilies

Second: Stories of Grace

Third: Ponder, our rosary book, and my personal favorite! There is also Ponder FOR KIDS!!! :)

There’s True Friend, our study on Biblical friendship!

Flourish is our study on St. Paul’s letter to the Romans.

Call Me Blessed focuses on St. John Paul II’s Letter to Women and examples of Biblical Womanhood.

And our most recent study, Better Together, about hospitality.

Trust, Courage, Faith, and Transplants

I had a holy hour last week before Mass, and as I was paging through my Magnificat, I noticed a few things.

Do you see them, too?

Matthew 9:1-8

The Healing of a Paralytic. He entered a boat, made the crossing, and came into his own town. And there people brought to him a paralytic lying on a stretcher. When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, “Courage, child, your sins are forgiven.” At that, some of the scribes said to themselves, “This man is blaspheming.” Jesus knew what they were thinking, and said, “Why do you harbor evil thoughts? Which is easier, to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Rise and walk’? But that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins”—he then said to the paralytic, “Rise, pick up your stretcher, and go home.” He rose and went home. When the crowds saw this they were struck with awe and glorified God who had given such authority to human beings.

And here….

Matthew 9:18-26

The Official’s Daughter and the Woman with a Hemorrhage. While he was saying these things to them, an official came forward, knelt down before him, and said, “My daughter has just died. But come, lay your hand on her, and she will live.” Jesus rose and followed him, and so did his disciples.  A woman suffering hemorrhages for twelve years came up behind him and touched the tassel on his cloak.  She said to herself, “If only I can touch his cloak, I shall be cured.”  Jesus turned around and saw her, and said, “Courage, daughter! Your faith has saved you.” And from that hour the woman was cured.

 When Jesus arrived at the official’s house and saw the flute players and the crowd who were making a commotion,  he said, “Go away! The girl is not dead but sleeping.” And they ridiculed him. When the crowd was put out, he came and took her by the hand, and the little girl arose.  And news of this spread throughout all that land.

Do you see it?

Before Jesus heals these people, he tells them to have courage.

A lot of people tell me I am brave.

I am not brave.

Doing what you have to do to keep on breathing is not brave. It’s necessary. Now, granted, I had to make the choice to go for transplant. If I hadn’t done that, then I wouldn’t be sitting here, writing this, precisely fourteen years later. In fact, as I write this (at 10:47 a.m.), fourteen years ago, I was in the OR. My surgery began around 6:45 in the morning (at least that’s when the epidural started, I think). So, yes, I made the decision to go for transplant. Was that brave? I don’t know. I don’t personally think so.

Really, though, a lot of the time, I did not feel brave. I did not have the courage Jesus is telling these people to have.

But as I looked at these verses, I thought, this is right. They need courage for what’s about to happen. Because it’s scary, to be suddenly plunged into a world you didn’t think was possible, something you had hoped for, but didn’t think would actually happen. It’s sort of terrifying.

These people had faith that Jesus could cure them. And I had faith, too. I’ve always had it. I’ve never doubted my faith. But did I have courage? Did I trust Jesus?

Ah. That’s the slow growing bloom of faith. Faith is the seed. But courage and trust? That’s later. That’s a result. It’s the result of a lot of dark nights and lots of tears and feelings of this is never going to happen.

And I can say that even if I hadn’t been transplanted. Remember, God is always good. I would’ve been cured, either in heaven, or here on earth. And I was lucky that I got my miracle here. Some people aren’t as lucky as I was. That’s the sobering fact.

Throughout, though, Jesus tells us to have courage, because something is happening. And it might be something great. But in the moment, there is fear. There is death, as we see with the little girl. But then…

life.

Even if it’s life on the other side of death. We know how this story ends. We know that death is not the winner.

Trust in Jesus sounds great, and it is great, but until you’ve really had to surrender your will, to say I have no control over this—that’s when you need the courage. It takes courage to trust in God.

Jesus knew that. And I think that’s why he tells these people to have it, to grasp it, to be strong in the moment. Because in the moment when the miracle happens, you might feel like you’re going to drown—save me, Lord, I’m perishing!

If I look brave, it’s really because Jesus gives me the courage to take the steps forward. It’s not my courage at all. It’s his.

My Dominican saint is Bl. Lucy of Narni—and yes, she’s the one C.S. Lewis used as inspiration for both the name “Narnia” and Lucy Pevensie. I’ve always loved Lucy. But remember, Aslan tells Lucy, “Courage, dear heart.”

We need to be reminded to have courage, to keep trusting.

Day In the Life: Yearly Transplant Testing

I thought that I’d give you a little glimpse into a day at clinic, but in order to get the most bang for your reading buck, I chose do chronicle a day where I do yearly testing—as in, clinic, blood draws, X-rays, CT scan, and a DEXA (bone density) screening. So come along with me on Monday’s trip….

6:30 am: Alarm goes off.

7:20 am: Out the door, to the hospital!

It’s not raining! Yay!

The hospital is only 12 miles away form my place, so that makes it easy to get there, but morning rush hour can be a beast. Fortunately, it’s not bad, and I get to the parking garage at 7:45, after being asked for the nth time if I’m a visitor. No, I am a patient. Deep sigh.

Excellent parking!

The hospital has a nature theme, so there are lots of animals and other nature-ish things around. In case you can’t tell, those big green things are acorns.

7:50: Heading to Crossroads Registration

dooooown the long hallways.

I passed this bunny on the way in:

Registration is in the middle of the hospital complex and sometimes it can be a pain. But there was a nice lady behind the desk, the kiosks worked, I had my wrist band, and was on my way to infusion for my first appointment….

Up we go!

The tower building used to be the main hospital—I’ve spent a lot of time here. :) The fourth floor (4AE) where infusion is is where the adult CF floor used to be. It’s where I almost died and it’s where I waited the night my transplant came.

The 4th floor is also home—or was—to the PICU. So yeah, the fourth floor has lots of great memories. (Seriously, some are good. Most are….not.)

It does, however, have a good vending machine.

Anyway!

8:00 Infusion

In the waiting room—Muppet Babies on TV.

Great view, huh?

Since I was early, I got taken back early—yay!—into one of the rooms. Like I said, these used to be patient rooms. Now they’re smaller. Most of infusion is separated by walls and curtained off areas, but since I’m a transplant patient I go into an actual room.

Sometimes infusions last for hours. Really, the reason I go to infusion isn’t to get meds, it’s to get my port accessed for blood draws. So the room has a bed, and the other areas have recliners, if you’re staying. I’m not. This is an in and out thing.

My great nurse comes in and sets things up….

Fortunately no vitamin levels today, so only three tubes. We could not get that out of my veins. So—port!

The blurry part is the strips that have my ID number on them and get attached to various things when the blood goes to the lab.

And yes, everyone must wear PPE—personal protective equipment—when they access the port. Gowns, gloves, masks, and hair nets. It’s like we’re doing surgery here.

So, we’re running ahead of the game, but then my port decides to be dumb, so we have to wrestle with it for ten minutes, but finally it cooperates and we get the blood. Then we flush the line with saline and heparin, and de-access me. Yay!

I am free to go back down to the main floor!

Hallway out to the waiting room.

Doooown we go.

This used to be part of the old ER—the parking lot to the right is where we dropped me off the night of my transplant.

(Bunnies ahead!)

This used to be “main” radiology, and the little hallway you see above used to run between radiology and the ER. This also used to be the main hospital through way—if you went to the end of this hallway you’d reach the main lobby. But I digress!

I’ve been coming to this part of the hospital for twenty-six years. It’s very familiar.

As is this hallway, but now they’re changing it! I don’t know what to do ! :-p

8:40 AM: Chest X-ray

So I have my probably five millionth chest x-ray (that’s a conservative estimate), before which I ran into my post-transplant buddy Amber, who is also going to clinic. It’s always fun to see friends!

So, out of radiology, heading toward clinic, and passing the fish tank and the satellite gift shop.

(Yes. There are two gift shops)

Sharkbait!

Past the coffee bar….

To the elevators, and up to good old fifth floor CF clinic! :) Also been coming through this door for 35 years. :)

9:00 AM: Clinic

This is where I spent the bulk of my time. On a “yearly” clinic day, everyone comes in: the doctors, the dietician, the social workers—and things get a little more in-depth. (Not so much on the doctor end, since I see him every three months.)

*The dietician asks me to talk about what I normally eat: meals and snacks. She’ll then give suggestions. Right now, we’re dealing with weight loss and the silly A1c levels (more on that in a bit), so we want to make sure I’m eating the right combination of things. She made some suggestions, I asked some questions, and it took about a half hour, probably. I really like the dietician so that helps. :)

*My Doctor. I see one of the two docs on the team every three months. This time, he was happy with how I was doing, and we talked about the A1c thing.

Basically, the A1c is a test that looks at how your blood processes sugar all the time—it’s like a batting average. It’s how much sugar “sticks” to your red blood cells. For normal people, you want it to be under 6% For post transplant people, you want it to be in the low 6%, because the prednisone we’re one messes with how our bodies process sugar. So we aren’t aiming for normal people normal, but abnormal normal. :)

I had been testing my blood glucose levels (BGLs) for a few months, and my doctor didn’t think my numbers were really all that bad. (Again, we’re looking at abnormal normal here. Not normal people. ) He did say that if my A1c was up, then we’d probably have to start me on a low-dose, long-acting form of insulin. It wasn’t really because I hadn’t done what they asked—I lost weight, I’m being more active, and I’m checking my BGLs—but because I’ve been on prednisone for 14 years, and I’m in menopause, which, as we know, messes with hormones like nuts.

But my Chest X-ray looked good, and my PFTs were up a point, so lung wise, things are great. Sinus wise, things are great. I’m seeing all my specialists like I’m supposed to and I keep clinic informed of things there.

My doctor wanted me to do some other PFTs so I had to go back to the lab, but we’ll get there in a second. :)

*Social Work: Normally, they just come in and ask how I’m doing and give me a parking token. Since I’m working with some insurance insanity right now, we had more to talk about and they are going to look into some things for me which is massively helpful. So I was happy!

Finally, Pulmonary Function Tests, aka, PFTs.

Normally, when I say I’m doing PFTs, what I mean is I’m doing spirometry. Aka, the thing where you sit down, put clamps on your nose, and breathe in through a tube connected to a computer. You breathe easily for a few breaths (for me it’s two) and then on the third you take in a huge breath, like you’re about to go underwater, then blow it out fast and hard.

You then get results that look like this:

swirly bit is blocked out personal info. :)

Now, this is in liters, and I generally look at percentages. As of yesterday I had about 54% lung function, which is good for me, and that’s the “moderate restrictive defect” part. It’s not anything to worry about, it just says that at the bottom.

I also did two other kinds of tests which check how gases are diffused in my blood and other breathing related things. Those were also fine. So yay there.

11:00 Finished clinic, back to radiology!

I finished in clinic, said goodbye, and my nurse said she’d email me with follow-up things. I then headed back down the elevators,

past the fish….

And back to radiology.

This was a bone density scan that did scans of everything—we did hip focus and lumbar focus, and then the whole body. This is important because prednisone (don’t we love it?!) also causes issues with bone density and causes osteoporosis. Fortunately my bones are AWESOME. I hope they continue to be awesome—I haven’t gotten these results back yet.

FINALLY, the LAST TEST!

11:45 am: Chest CT

so heading back through the center of the hospital, to the Magic Forest!

And into the CT room:

This is just a regular old CT scan of my lungs to make sure we’re not missing any small things that might be happening that regular X-rays don’t pick up. Easy peasy.

So I was free, and said goodbye to the bunny, at around 12:15!

I was really hungry at this point, because I’d only had a little breakfast—you’re not supposed to eat a lot before clinic visits in case something scary shows up in testing and you have to have a bronchoscopy that day. (Yes, that has happened to me before.)

So I was hungry and had walked about a mile and a half, not kidding, in the halls of the hospital. I hit my move goal for the day at 3 PM, so I knew that I’d get a decent workout on this day, lol.

This used to be a longer day—there used to be more tests. So I’m fortunate that this was a pretty quick day and everything went well, except for the silly port being stupid! :)

Yarn Along #91

Hi y’all! Happy almost Independence Day (if you’re American)!

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I’m still working on my Dahlia scarf: it’s four skeins of yarn, so it’s long, but I’m in the third skein now, so I’m past the halfway mark. It’s crazy simple knitting, just garter stitch, so that makes it really easy to do while I watch TV (Wimbledon!) or movies, or if people are visiting and I want something to do with my hands while we talk!

The book is Greek to Me: Adventures of the Comma Queen, which I’ve been intrigued by since I saw it at Tattered Cover in Denver in April. which is about the author’s trip to Greece and how the Greek language influenced English.

A Little Book and Movie Talk

I know, I hardly ever write on Saturday, but, I wanted to share some things with you, and there wasn’t an “official” Seven Quick Takes yesterday, which is good because I was editing the last bit of the manuscript! So the manuscript is edited! My editor will read it again, and then send it to the copy editor at Ave Maria Press in early July.

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I should also be getting cover design shortly….and pre-orders should open soon!

Can you feel the excitement? I can!!!!

(Sign up for updates to get the news FIRST on all the book stuff!)

Anyway, speaking of books that aren’t mine….

The Feast of St. Thomas More was on the 22nd (which is also my mom’s birthday).

The Fourth of July is this coming week

So, in the spirt of both those things, let me offer you some good reading and film suggestions!

(These are Amazon affiliate links, FYI!)

St. Thomas More

If you aren’t familiar with this awesome saint, become so!

For movies, of course it’s A Man For All Seasons.

For books: The King’s Good Servant, But God’s First, by James Monti

For a look at the relationship with his daughter, Meg (which was a great one), read A Daughter’s Love: Thomas More and His Dearest Meg, by John Guy

American History

The Battle of Gettysburg raged from July 1-July 3. I highly recommend reading Michael Shaara’s The Killer Angels and watching the film Gettysburg (which is based on Shaara’s book).

If you want to go back to the Revolutionary War, I suggest HBO’s series John Adams (Fabulous, based on the equally great book by David McCullough), the musical 1776 (great music, but also a great story), and the book 1776, also by David McCullough. Reading 1776 is an eye-opener. There was really no way the US was supposed to win the war, and that comes through with incredibly clarity in McCullough’s writing.

But we did win.

In terms of kid-friendliness—they can totally watch 1776. It’s very family-friendly. John Adams isn’t not family friendly but it’s sort of long, so I don’t know if it would hold kids’ attention, but older kids and teens? Definitely. Gettysburg is also long, and while it’s not incredibly graphic, it is about war. (Obviously) But I think kids could watch some of it. Teens, definitely.

Seven Quick Takes--Writing Updates, Birthdays, A Wedding....

Linking up with Kelly!

-I-

If you missed it, my sister got married last week!

It was a beautiful day! I’ll have more about travel logistics up soon, as well as the second part of my April trip…..bad me, I know! I’m being a slacker blogger!

-II-

But I have a reason to be slacker blogger—it’s time for edits! Which means:

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I got edits up to Chapter 11 (there are 15 main chapters, plus the prayer section, and the intro and preface, so 17 chapters and prayers) from my editor yesterday, so now it’s time to DIVE IN. So if it’s quiet around here, that’s why. Amuse yourselves by looking through the archives!

(Or buy Catholic 101! $5!)

-III-

So yes, I’ll be in the office, by Corgi corner, writing. :)

What is Corgi Corner?

This. :)

It’s a Corgi Calendar that my friend Sarah sent me for my birthday, a card with a leaping corgi on the cover, and my Susan Branch Royal Corgi mug, because hello it’s THE BEST.

I fill the mug with tea, and I write. Corgi corner keeps me going!

-IV-

Happy First Day of Summer! It’s been so rainy here that when the sun is out I feel like Gollum:

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It’s only going to be 75 today so not quite warm enough to swim, but warm enough to get outside and squint at the bright thing in the sky!

-v-

We’re hitting the big Birthday Stride in our family: Dad’s birthday was on Wednesday, my new brother in law’s is today, my mom’s is tomorrow, mom and dad’s anniversary (their fortieth!) is on the 30th, and that’s also my grandma’s 89th birthday.

WHEW!

-VI-

The trip to CO was our big trip of the summer so the rest of the summer is delightfully free. Of course I’m working on edits because they’re due before the Fourth of July, but after that, who knows what’s going to happen? Well, other than clinic in July—the big yearly testing date, with CTs and bone density scans—and then my fourteenth transplant anniversary on the 11th!

-VII-

I also need to update you about books I’m reading but we’ll do that later…..I’ll add it to my blog list. In the meantime, tell me what you’re reading! I’m always looking for new titles to pick up!

A Wedding In the Mountains: Melanie and Jason

(Photos by Mel’s photographer, not me! :) )

My sister got married last week, and I have a new brother!

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We’re excited about this. :)

The wedding was on June 13 at Our Lady of the Mountains Catholic Church.

This is a beautiful church! Pope St. John Paul II visited it during World Youth Day in Denver in 1993.

The church was stunning……so here are pictures (especially for family members who couldn’t come, but really, for everyone, because we all need beauty!)

St. Francis with Brother Elk. I saw quite a few people coming to pray here while we were there. It seems like a really popular devotional spot in Estes Park!

Isn’t she gorgeous?!

The stained glass windows around the nave showcased the sacraments. Thought this one was especially appropriate!

The altar and tabernacle—the tabernacle has the five loaves and two fishes on it.

View from the doors

It’s a really gorgeous church, with a statue of the Sacred Heart, a St. Michael window in the choir loft, and last but not least, a really amazing priest! He gave a beautiful homily on how marriage is about joy and sorrow, how marriage really begins the time you have your first fight (basically) or have a bad/sad moment, and how marriage is about being selfless, instead of selfish, because you’re one now. You’re not two. It was appropriate he spoke about joy, because that’s my sister’s middle name! I wish I had a copy of the homily, it was so inspiring.

The reception was intimate, held at a local steakhouse. But there was still cake (well, cupcake) smashing….

And a first dance….

I was a bridesmaid, so I was busy throughout the day and didn’t have time to take a ton of pictures, but that’s what I have. :)

We stayed at The Stanley Hotel (AKA, where Stephen King got the inspiration for The Shining) and my room had a great view:

So, that’s all I have right now, in terms of photos, but it was a lovely, intimate wedding in a gorgeous place, and I’m so happy for my sister and my new brother in law! :)